NPR article

Although we normally think about people becoming sexually attracted to someone first and then falling in love with them, she says, it can happen the other way around.

The women Diamond studied who became lesbians later in life were more confused than upset, she says. For a lot of the women, the experience was very satisfying.

“The women would say, ‘I don’t know what’s going on, but I love this woman. I’ve never felt like this before,'” she says.”

You know, the more I read about female sexuality, the more I really want to create something about it. There’s so little out there right now, and though that’s changing, we still need lots more and still have a long way to go, and in my mind, there’s no better way to do that than stories that have complete and total respect for female/female relationships. Fiction has the unique power of showing the world a different path, a better path through a shared experience in which we can empathize and understand female sexuality and in which we can imagine ourselves as the characters. If we present and portray them honestly- as strong, extremely loving, intuitive, and independent- then those who read the story or see the film will start to look at these kind of relationships with the seriousness they so deserve.

As a woman who has been in love and had sexual relationships with other women, I can tell you this straight up: it is satisfying on a level that is completely indescribable to men. I love the male gender, I really do- but no joke, one of the reasons I chose my husband is because at times he is sexually intuitive like a woman. Now, I don’t blame men entirely for being ignorant of female sexuality- after all, we are all products of the times we live in, what with patriarchy and rape culture and all that disgusting mess- but we have entered a time where knowledge is now available at the click of a button, where we are no longer distant from one another but available by several means of communication, art is opening up and reflecting all these changes, authority and oppression are being openly challenged, so in my eyes, there is no longer an excuse for male ignorance of female sexuality. And to be honest, I have several male friends who are already in touch with it, and I’m seeing ripples everywhere. So what do we have in our arsenal to combat the still prevalent ignorance? Rights activists, social media, journalism, education, all those and more. But, to me at least, there is nothing more powerful than Art. And right now is the era of The Story. I’ve been so happy to see the few films and shows come out recently that portray female love stories the way they ought to be, and not only that, I’ve noticed a shift in how male love stories are portrayed as well- they are more passionate, more open, more…feminine. It’s beautiful, it’s so beautiful. Men, pay attention. This is one of the *few* examples why the Feminine needs to be restored to her rightful place as an EQUAL to the Masculine.

I want more stories on female sexuality, relationships, and the unique love they share. It’s so important, I can’t even stress enough how important it is. Men, you want more freedom to explore your own sexuality? (and I know you do)- free the women. Listen to them. Respect them. Understand them. Realize we are not here to serve you, or entertain you, or bear your children. We are here to free you, free all of us from the stifling bonds of patriarchy. I love you- I adore men, I truly do, you have the potential for such amazing beauty- so work alongside us. We have to do this together or it won’t work.

“The reason we’re so fucked up right now is because we’re undergoing evolution.” -Bill Hicks

Balance is being restored.

Fuck, I need to write about this. I have to.

Oh, by the way, the first paragraph of that quote from the article above, that is the entire theme of the Sherlock series. One of the many, many reasons I love that show so much is that it’s not only about Sherlock and John coming to terms with their feelings for one another, it’s also a journey of Sherlock learning to not underestimate women and realizing they are an integral part of his personal growth and ability to give in to love. Those two things are inseparable. As they are with all of us.


~ by hln351 on March 4, 2015.

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